Thursday, July 31, 2014

Absent Minded Much?

So, for those of you that don't know… I suffer from migraines. For those of you that think that those are just really bad headaches… Wrong. Let me walk you through a typical migraine.

For some migraine sufferers it just means pain. But for me it means an aura as well. I start feeling like my body is not my body. I lose my peripheral vision and one side of my body starts to go numb. I become nauseous and I end up vomiting. After about 45 minutes of this, the searing pain will hit on the opposite side of my head. And now I am in full migraine mode. For the next 8 to 10 hours, parts of my body will continually go in and out of numbness. I will lose feeling in one or both sides of my arms, face, legs. My hands and fingers will curl in and I will lose the ability to control them from time to time. My ability to understand what you are saying or the ability to talk comes and goes. And ALL of this happens while feeling like I am being stabbed in the eye by a burning hot fire poker. And then the next day I pretty much feel like I've been hit by a truck. 

The first time this happened was when I was pregnant with Spencer. It didn't happen again until I was pregnant with Tatum. And again when I was pregnant with Lucy. I thought I had found a pattern. And I was somewhat okay with it because I was making people. I could endure the pain because it would all be worth it. But since having Declan I have had about 10 more of these horrible episodes. 

I recently relented and saw a neurologist and I have an MRI scheduled for tomorrow. I am on a new preventative migraine medication. But my body has to learn to become accustomed to it. 

These are the side effects:

Tiredness, drowsiness, dizziness, loss of coordination, tingling of the hands and feet, loss of appetite, bad taste in your mouth, diarrhea, weight loss, mental problems, confusion, slowed thinking, trouble concentrating, trouble paying attention, nervousness, memory problems, speech and language problems.

They say it takes about eight weeks for the medication to level off, for your body to become accustomed to what's happening. I am on week two. I find myself forgetting words. Forgetting what I'm doing. Losing focus. I am not used to taking the kids to ONE store and being so completely mentally and physically drained that I cannot go anywhere else, let alone remember why I'm there or find my way home. I am not used to asking for help. I am a multitasker and I find myself only capable of doing one thing at a time, if that. 

So you may be wondering to yourself, why is she telling me all this? I'm asking for help. Actually… Just for a little bit of leniency. If I seem out of focus or if you ask me for something and I forget, or I don't seem up to the task, please cut me some slack. I promise I'm trying, but it may be more than this medicated self can handle at the moment.